oomshi:

paris hilton is my idol bc shes famous for being famous

  • In the club: Who dat? Who dat? I-G-G-Y
  • On the blogs: Iggy Australia is a racist imperialist! Fascist!!! Colonist!!! Who is responsible for desert storm!!!!
  • postllimit:

    why iphones gotta take two million years to turn back on after they die like you plug em in and you’re all ready to start texting again but they’re like “nope. i gotta take some time for myself. figure out who i am. you hurt me too much the last time. let me think.”

    almightykushlord:

    Dakarai Molokomme, a 15-year-old starving child from a small village in Zimbabwe, has just told , one of the most famous pop stars in the world, to  and f*** , the local media are reporting exclusively.

    “Yes, it’s true, I told Madonna to go f*** herself. Do you want to know why?” Dakarai asked. “It’s the same thing every time with these snobby rich Americans. Every once in a while they come to show us their support for the so-called eradication of poverty by adopting a child from a starving family, but they actually do more harm than good. Transracial international adoptions are part of the white savior industrial complex,” Dakarai explained.

    In further discussions with journalists from the media, the  stated that “none of the children here actually want to be taken away from their family and friends so they can be displayed as some kind of trophy in the homes of self-righteous singers or actors who want to score some points with the media and Oprah.”

    “If they really want to help us, they should get Big Pharma to ship us some anti-retroviral drugs for the AIDS epidemic, or build schools and hospitals. If they don’t want to do that, then they can all go f** themselves!” the child told reporters.

    The 15-year-old also stated that he would say the same thing to any one of those American or European “faux humanitarian posers”, except for Bono, whom he said he would also kick in the groin.

    “Bono’s efforts to save the African savage from itself prove that the colonial imperative is alive and well,” Dakarai said as he walked with other village children collecting sticks to build a tree fort.

    THIS IS THE RAWEST 15 YEAR OLD ALIVE

    "Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian any more than going to a garage makes you an automobile."
    Billy SundayBilly Sunday, the Man and His Message: With His Own Words Which Have Won Thousands for Christ (via feellng)
    tmntyler:

mormondad:

This is how I stayed alive my senior year

I’m glad I’m not the only one who thinks of time like this.

    gorlt:

    and, if you can’t afford my recipes try Rachel Ray’s cheap ass

    image

    hvngers:

    "i shouldn’t eat this" I say as I shove it into my mouth

    bullshit-time:

    nebulamutt:

    Think about it.
    If you hate on furries
    You have no right to watch popular shows such as adventure time, regular show, pretty much ANY show with a talking animal.

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    liamfx:

    staff at checkout: that’ll be $9.95
    me: here’s $10.00
    me: keep the change 
    image

    spritegotmeonpayroll:

    kismaayo:

    No notes

    No family, 16 in the middle of Miami